Christi Howard Shares Her Passion for Organ Donation in Honor of Her Daughter Ashley: Ep 39

Christy Howard joins Amy Durham and Michele Davis to share their unique experience on organ donation few have experienced - being both a recipient family and a donor family. Her journey began when her father-in-law received a life-saving liver transplant in his seventies. The miracle wasn't lost on Christy's daughter Ashley, who eagerly registered as an organ donor when getting her learner's permit at 15.

Tragically, just seven months later, Ashley suffered a catastrophic brain injury in a boating accident. After four days of intensive care, she was declared brain dead. Without hesitation, Christy and her husband honored Ashley's wishes, beginning a complex process that would ultimately save four lives - including an 8-year-old girl who received Ashley's heart after being confined to a hospital, dependent on an artificial heart device.

The symmetry is profound: Ashley shared a birthday with her grandfather who received a transplant, spent four days in the hospital and saved four lives. "She literally lives on," Christy explains, finding purpose in this continuation of Ashley's presence in the world.

Christy dispels common misconceptions about organ donation, explaining that medical teams exhaust every life-saving option before donation is considered. She highlights the urgent need - over 100,000 Americans currently await transplants, with 17 dying daily while waiting, and a new name added every eight minutes.

For fifteen years, Christy has channeled her grief into advocacy, educating hospital staff, high school students, and community groups. Through her storytelling, Ashley's impact extends far beyond the four lives she directly saved - countless others have registered as donors after learning about this remarkable young woman's legacy.

Have you registered as an organ donor? More importantly, have you shared your wishes with your family? These conversations matter - you truly have the power to donate life.

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Chapters

• 0:00 Introducing Christy Howard's Story
• 1:32 Being a Recipient Family First
• 4:44 Ashley's Decision to Become a Donor
• 7:26 The Process of Organ Donation
• 13:37 Four Lives Saved Through Ashley
• 16:30 Dispelling Myths About Organ Donation
• 16:36 [Ad] The Living in Clarity Podcast, with Fish & Coach
• 17:10 (Cont.) Dispelling Myths About Organ Donation
• 23:30 Finding Purpose Through Advocacy
• 26:40 Ashley's Ongoing Legacy

Transcript

Speaker 1: 0:07

Hello and welcome back to Warrior Moms. I am Michelle Davis.

Speaker 2: 0:12

And I am Amy Durham and we are so glad to have y'all here with our friend, miss Christy Howard, talking about something that's very near and dear to her heart, and it's organ donation. This is April when we're filming this and it is organ donation awareness month, so that is a big part of Christy and Ashley her daughter, ashley's story and how Ashley lives on, and I just want to hear Christy's. They have a very unique story for organ donation and I'd love to hear you tell us about that, miss Christy. Thank you for being here.

Speaker 3: 0:53

Yes, Well, thank you. Thank you, Michelle and Amy for having me. As Amy shared, april is National Donate Life Month, so there's a lot of awareness and education that the Donate life and various organ there's. Lifelink of Georgia is the organ procurement organization for Georgia. Each state has their own. So, yes, organ donation is very near and dear to our family.

Speaker 3: 1:26

We're kind of unique because we are a recipient family, meaning my father-in-law received an organ a liver back in the early 2000s and when Ashley passed she was a organ donor. So we've lived through both Terry's dad. My father-in-law his name's William was was very sick with hepatitis C, which he got from a blood transfusion way back long, long ago before they did all the screenings, for you know when they did blood transfusions and stuff before they screened for hepatitis. So he got hepatitis and became very, very sick and was placed on the list to receive a liver and after about six months of waiting and him being very, very ill, he received a liver. He was at Emory Hospital here in Atlanta and he was able to completely resume a very normal life after receiving his liver.

Speaker 2: 2:48

And how old was he at that time? He was about 65.

Speaker 3: 2:55

Oh good, Around that age.

Speaker 2: 3:00

Around that age.

Speaker 3: 3:01

Yeah, that's awesome. He and Ashley shared the same birthday, so they've had a very special bond. He always said Ashley was the best birthday gift he'd ever received, and so she got to see her papa from very bedridden in the hospital most of the time, to come home again and lead a very active life. So she was, um, very in tune at a young age. You know we were waiting for the, for his organ and, and our kids had a first row seat as to what that looks like, you know, to seeing somebody that might die because they. You know there was a chance that he might not have. You know he would not have survived.

Speaker 2: 4:06

had he not gotten the organ he would not have survived.

Speaker 3: 4:09

He was in a very yeah, he was at that state. So that was our family's experience with being a recipient. And then we fast forward it to when Ashley turned 15, she went and got and my husband just corrected me he was 71 when he got his liver. So I was hesitating, it's you know. So much has happened since then yes, no, that's what I was saying about yeah, thank you.

Speaker 3: 4:44

So she went to get her learner's permit. And when you go to get your learner's permit at 15, they ask you on there if you want to be an organ donor. That's your first opportunity and Ashley was so excited to sign up at it. I have a picture of her holding her permit. And so little did we know that she turned 15 in October seven.

Speaker 3: 5:09

Seven months later she would be severely injured, brain injury suffered from a boating accident.

Speaker 3: 5:24

Just to refresh her, we were at the lake and she was being pulled on the tube on the back of our boat and fell off into the water. And a boat did not see her in the water and ran her over and the propeller cut her on the back of the head and caused a severe brain injury. And four days later she was pronounced brain dead. So we were approached by the doctors when they started the brain death test, asking us if we thought about or considered Ashley becoming a donor, and we immediately said oh, we don't even have to think about it. Talk about it, number one. She is one which they did not know. So that goes to one of the myths that's often out there. There was no asking us when we arrived at the hospital. If she was a donor. There was no asking us in those first three days of treatment where they were doing everything they could to save her. If she was a donor, no one tried to dig through her purse and pull out her license to see if she was a donor.

Speaker 3: 6:30

Yeah, it's just a huge myth. The doctors and nurses are very much there to try to do everything they can to save your life and we witnessed that firsthand and so. But we did say she was a donor, our, you know. We shared with them our family's story of being on the other side as a recipient, and that was Ashley's wish and that we absolutely wanted to move forward with that. So that was.

Speaker 2: 7:02

Now as much sadness as it brought you to say goodbye to Ashley. At that time, did y'all have a little bit of joy, knowing that you were giving someone else life like someone had given your father-in-law life, Exactly?

Speaker 3: 7:18

Or were you just?

Speaker 3: 7:19

so in the broken that you didn't recognize it at the time we absolutely recognized it because we had been at the hospital day in and day out for four days. Four know this horrific day at the lake that she could turn, she could save lives, and we were very much. And there was still even at that point it was still a lot of things had to be done to make her body stay, her organs stay viable for transplant. So once you're um, you're declared dead first by the doctors, right, whether it's a cardiac death or a brain death test. So Ashley was, was brain dead. And so at that point LifeLinked Georgia has a team that comes in and takes over. They have nurses, they have their own doctors, they're separate from the hospital. So they come in and they start all their testing and to make sure what you know what's going to what's going to be viable and they're on a time clock to be able to make that happen.

Speaker 3: 8:51

So then that process began. We're like, yes, we want her to be a donor and make seeing if that could happen. If that could happen, what? What she was going to be able to donate.

Speaker 1: 9:05

So Were you at the hospital during that whole time.

Speaker 3: 9:11

We were we were there while they were prepping her body, keeping her body, they actually you know they start pumping so much fluids and doing a lot of things just to really keep her organs functioning. With a brain death, obviously it's different than if you have a cardiac death or have a massive heart attack.

Speaker 3: 9:30

Obviously your heart's not going to be there If there's some kind of injury from an accident or a crash or whatever, then your organs shut down and it can't happen. So not everyone that dies. So not everyone that dies that's another myth can be an organ donor, but oftentimes they can donate tissue or other things that can save people's life Tendons, skin bone nerves valves, that kind of thing.

Speaker 2: 9:58

I had no idea. I just think about the big organs like the like the heart, liver, the lung, you know, but oh wow.

Speaker 3: 10:18

Yeah, but it's organs and tissue, you know. So, heart, definitely, kidneys, lung, pancreas, liver, intestines, corneas, skin, need you know? They need things to be able to walk again or see again or whatever. So but it just depends. Ashley ended up saving the lives of four others because her heart, her two kidneys and her liver could be donated. Even with her, there was her lungs, she was in lake water, she, you know there was a lot to it because of her skin or some of that.

Speaker 3: 10:54

I don't even really know some of the reasons why, but just because of her situation, of how she died, and that there were some things that couldn't be donated and the amount of time. We're talking four days from the time that the accident happened. So there's just so much behind the scenes because, as you asked, michelle, yes, we were there until she was taken down to the OR for her organs to be harvested. They flew in the doctors, they do it right, she was at Grady, so they're a transplant center, so they could do it all there and we knew that her heart and her heart for sure. We knew that was happening because they kind of went out of.

Speaker 3: 11:44

Typically they're in a region of where where organs go based on geographic location because of the time that they have to, and the girl that was the number one on the list was was out of state, a little bit further away, and so they were flying those doctors in and everything for it. So we knew that that was all happening and again it's just we. You don't know until the surgery's over if the organs make it, if they survive, and then they get transplanted and if they take or whatever. So there's just, there's just so much to it that people don't understand. It's not that just someone dies and they just take it. You know can take all the organs, or that they're going to work, or that you know what they have to do to match them and all that. So it's quite a process to make it really happen.

Speaker 2: 12:42

But you knew that, ashley, four of her organs have helped four people.

Speaker 1: 12:50

Just the beautiful intersections of it all, that her birthday was the same as your father-in-law, that she was there in the hospital four days and then she was able to save four people. I mean, it's just some beautiful symmetry. Yeah, it's unbelievable.

Speaker 3: 13:07

I know where I got the 62 number from that. A man that age received her liver, so he was a little bit older. Gentleman received her liver, and he received it at Emory too, so that was interesting he had the jackpot on that.

Speaker 2: 13:25

That older man got that precious little liver. I know he got a beautiful thing right there, didn't he? I?

Speaker 3: 13:31

love that then two, two different adult females each received a kidney, and then a young girl that was eight years old received her heart.

Speaker 1: 13:42

So oh my gosh that I'm.

Speaker 2: 13:46

I'm not trying to discredit any of those, but that eight-year-old's mama's heart. I know, you know the joy that she had that day that phone call right that it was happening that it was happening.

Speaker 3: 14:03

Yeah, she was being kept alive with what's called a Berlin heart. That, just that, basically, you know, keeps your body going, that she, she, wasn't going to be able to function anymore outside of a hospital setting until she received a transplant.

Speaker 1: 14:20

That is so moving, christy, that is, I'm kind of at a loss for words just currently it's just that hits you hard it does.

Speaker 3: 14:31

And you know that's what. When I, over the years because it's been almost 15 years in june will be 15 years since ashley um donated her organs and over the years of people that I just don't know if I would have been able to do that if it was my child and I said okay so are you saying, if your child was dying and needed a new heart, you wouldn't take a heart either? Yeah, yeah. What a, what a?

Speaker 1: 15:03

what a powerful question.

Speaker 3: 15:04

Um yeah right, see, and I'm I'm the opposite.

Speaker 2: 15:10

I I could 100 do it you know, alec wasn't in a position to be able to donate any. Yeah there's a lot or anything and I think that that would be the biggest gift of all is it's the gift of life for somebody else, and if I'd been asked for him, then absolutely take as much as possible.

Speaker 1: 15:30

Yeah, yeah, we had said the exact same thing and because it was a crime scene, we were denied, of course, because they had to, you know, complete so much work. It's like, oh my gosh, and I I can understand why it was an immediate yes.

Speaker 3: 15:49

Yeah, and that's in her situation brain death. You know that your, your organs are still basically viable and functioning and really be, you know, the ideal candidate organs to stay viable, even though all of her still weren't even with that situation. So it's just that's what I like to be able to educate people on it. It is just not. It's just not this easy process that people think it is from. Misunderstand that it is. You know that it has.

Speaker 3: 16:24

There has to be so many things that just go so right for it to happen, which is why there's over a hundred thousand people, as of today, are on the national transplant waiting list and 17 people die every day waiting for um, a transplant. 17 people and basically a new name is added to the wait list every eight minutes. Oh gosh, oh my gosh. There's a huge, a huge impact that the donors can with saving up to eight lives, you know, with the organ and then with the organs, the main organs themselves, but then 70, you know, 75 other lives could theoretically be impacted with things with the skin and tissue and that kind of donation. So, but I think that there's been a lot of education done over the years, that the myth of way back in the time about. You know the ambulance drivers are literally going to go in your purse and pull out your places.

Speaker 3: 17:55

If you're an organ donor and that they're just going to let you die right then to get your organ. So that's never made sense. It's like wait, they're going to let you die so someone else can look like they're going to pick who they're going to let die and they don't know either one of you, yeah, right. Oh my gosh. I'm afraid they won't save my life. But yeah, so 2024 was actually. The US surpassed 48,000 organ transplants, but when you know that there's 100,000 people waiting, you know that's still. You know there's still like.

Speaker 1: 18:36

I said Volunteer numbers.

Speaker 2: 18:38

Yes, for sure, you speak out and you go and you speak to. Who all do you speak to? Because I know you're an advocate for this, like tenfold.

Speaker 3: 18:54

So LifeLink of Georgia, we're volunteer speakers for them. So a lot of times it's educating even the nursing staff at hospitals as they're going through new the nurse orientation. The part of their orientation is learning. You know how to know when to make that phone call to Lifelink to let them know. You know that there's a possible donor situation and how to be able to be there for the families and that sort of thing. So we'll, we have done a lot of that. You know, over the years We've been asked to speak at high schools to kids that are, you know, getting ready to get their driver's license license. So we just various. You know we've been interviewed by magazine newspaper articles just over the years, but most of it comes through LifeLink of Georgia because we're registered, as you know, volunteer speakers there.

Speaker 2: 20:05

And I remember you saying one time and I don't know when we were talking about this, but it's important for those nurses, those people right there in one time and I don't know when we were talking about this, but it's important for those nurses, those people right there in the trenches during the time to approach the parents because, even though you knew she wanted to be an organ donor, you knew that the answer was yes. It wasn't in the forefront of your mind.

Speaker 3: 20:30

Yeah, and I think that their role is really to notify LifeLink of Georgia and they have someone on staff there at the hospital and they're the ones that will approach the families to keep the hospitals and the doctors out of it, but they're still going to be there. They may come in and say we want to ask you to start thinking about this. The Life Bank of Georgia hospital liaison might, and then they might go and let the family think about it. Well, the nurse may walk in the room and you know they may ask the nurse. You know, have you ever seen, like you know my child's been declared brain dead? Have you ever seen someone come back after they've been declared brain dead? So you know they they're there for support.

Speaker 3: 21:30

You know that they don't know when they're going to be in the situation of when they and and I share that with them that even though Terry's dad was a recipient the the four days that we were up at Grady before we were asked about that, it never, ever, ever crossed our mind going oh, we better check on this. I wonder if she can be an organ donor, like we never even thought of it. If they wouldn't have asked us, we would have left the hospital without her being a donor, because I don't think we would have ever thought of it. We probably would have later and been upset, have ever thought of it Maybe we probably would have later and been upset, but it has just meant so much to us that we don't think of it. I mean, ashley, you know, went to be with Jesus. Her soul did, but she literally lives on through. Her heart is beating in another person's body now her kidneys and her liver.

Speaker 3: 22:34

She lives on, and not only in those lives, but through the others that have been educated and have learned about organ donation through her story. She was 15 when it happened. Everyone was turning all of her friends, everyone at Sequoia High School, everyone where she went middle school, elementary, King's Ridge, Christian. These kids knew about it and we've just heard of story after story of people that have signed up and the impact that her organ donation story goes far beyond those, just those four people that she saved. I think it's just many, many, many lives that have been touched because of it.

Speaker 2: 23:23

I love it. I love it and it's because of your strength that you keep talking and spreading the word and everything and not letting it stop there, and you are helping save other lives and you're saving a lot of our lives that were your mom's, because you were such a true spirit of joy, of finding joy.

Speaker 1: 23:46

Yeah, and you started started our group, so we're so grateful for you.

Speaker 3: 23:51

One of the originals put it that way. There's been a lot of people that have been a part of it, and I just happened to be one of the originals that was there for our first meeting I think it was in 2017-ish and kind of helped keep it going, just because I administer the Facebook page and I'm the one that gets a meeting on the calendar every month.

Speaker 2: 24:21

Yeah, you still got the invite. Who's going to host? Who's going to host?

Speaker 3: 24:25

I make it happen every month, but I just feel it's just a huge privilege to me because I think I'm 15 years down the road. It's just an honor to be able to try to, to any way that I can offer some sort of comfort or just the feeling of knowing, just being able to look at me, cause I remember that feeling when I was in my early years of looking at people that were 10, 15 years, 20 years down the road and saying, oh, they made it.

Speaker 3: 25:01

You know, there's they're there and they look pretty good, you know. So I can do this too, and you good, you know so I can do this too, and you can.

Speaker 3: 25:11

You know we've talked about that. It's just. It's a lot of hard work and being intentional about, about finding joy and experiencing joy when, when those moments come to you. So, and being able to share Ashley's story and speak about organ donation and the impact that it can have on lives and try to make people think about that. You know from we've all learned that you just don't know what can happen in your life from one day to the other, and you know that you could be on either side of it in need of an organ or a family member donating and to, to, to think about it and tell your family members so that it shouldn't have to be a hard decision for anyone to make.

Speaker 3: 26:00

If, if, if they know your, you know, know your wishes, so um and so you know, so we have left that we can do in Ashley's honor. You know that's, that's been what we chose to to do for her.

Speaker 1: 26:15

So I love that. So, being that this is the month of organ donation, I know I'm going to share about your story. I did with my family and I have a teenager that's driving and just by talking about Ashley and you and Terry, you know, I got to hear that she wanted to be a donor which I hadn't known about. So I think that's important to share. You know, now we have a personal story to talk and share about, so thank you for doing that.

Speaker 3: 26:50

I think has happened with her over the years, that people knew her and then they've heard the story and they've continued to tell the story and just the awareness, because it's not something a lot of people think about. You know it's. It's not something that usually comes up every day until you know. Oftentimes it is when they're 16 years old and go and get their driver's license and they have to check that box and being like yeah, I remember when we turned 16 or 20 or whatever, like that get renewals, Do you want to be an organ donor?

Speaker 2: 27:25

And you check yes, so you would get $10 off. That's right. Back in the early days of that we were like, yeah, I'll take the discount.

Speaker 3: 27:40

For sure.

Speaker 2: 27:43

There is more to it than the driving license discount yeah.

Speaker 1: 27:49

Well, and I just wanted to remind the listeners. So, if you wanted to hear more about who Ashley was, Christy does a beautiful job talking about Ashley and, of course, the accident, but just how she and her family worked through their grief and the strategies that she figured you know, figured out of how to you know, find her joy that she talks about, and so her episode is what'd you say, Amy, 18?

Speaker 2: 28:16

Yes, her episode is number 18. And we also had her sister on Annie.

Speaker 3: 28:25

No, my daughter oh Ashley's sister, ashley's sister.

Speaker 2: 28:27

My daughter oh Ashley Ashley sister, my daughter, christy's daughter, who is Ashley's sister, and she was on episode 26.

Speaker 3: 28:36

Yeah.

Speaker 2: 28:36

So you can hear a siblings View of having, you know, having grown up without the sister and everything. So it's it's a full circle here. You know having growing up without the sister and everything. So it's a full circle here. You know, we've got mom, we've got sister and we've got her living on throughout the stories the life and you know four other lives.

Speaker 1: 29:03

Well, thank you, christy, for being here, and I know I'm going to continue to share throughout April, but of course, just in general, about Ashley and you and organ donation and enjoy spring break.

Speaker 3: 29:14

Thank you all so much for having me and giving me the opportunity to share this side of Ashley's story. I love it. You have the power to donate life.

Speaker 2: 29:23

Yes, power, power, power.

Speaker 1: 29:25

Thank you so much, and you can visit our website too, wwwwarriormomsme, and you can see just precious pictures of Ashley under Christy Howard's bio page. Yep.

Speaker 2: 29:39

Go visit and thank y'all for listening. We'll talk to y'all next time. All right, bye, bye.