Warrior Moms: Surviving Child Loss
A club no one wants to be in because the initiation is too big of a sacrifice: the loss of a child. Unthinkable. Unimaginable. Warrior Moms is local group in north Atlanta filled with strong, courageous, funny, and fiercely loving women who are surviving and thriving amidst horrific grief.
This podcast features Amy Durham and Michele Davis, two of the Warrior Moms, who will guide listeners through their grief journey. Every fourth or fifth episode will showcase another Warrior Mom, the trauma they endured, stories about their beloved child, and tips on how they get out of bed every day.
Each and every Warrior Moms' story is different, the children and the loss is different, but one thing they share is the decision to live. They have figured out how to live life putting one foot in the past and the other moving forward. Yes, it's beyond awful. Yes, it's hard. Yes, it's worth it. And yes, they say, you can survive child loss AND thrive.
Warrior Moms: Surviving Child Loss
Alison Chick -- Alex Chick's Story
How do we find moments of light after unthinkable loss? Alison Chick joins us to share how her life transformed when her son Alex died in a motorcycle accident just days after his high school graduation. Her raw honesty about that devastating day—from the moment she saw a traffic advisory near their home to the unbearable hospital visit—captures the shattering reality of losing a child.
Yet within this heartbreak, Alison reveals the unexpected ways she's found connection and meaning. She tells us about the "Alex winks"—those inexplicable moments when coincidences feel like something more. Like discovering that one of the women who stopped to comfort Alex after his accident had a meaningful encounter with Alison's husband years earlier. Or finding a heart-shaped petal in her memorial garden on a difficult Mother's Day.
What strikes deepest is Alison's grace-filled approach to grief. Six years later, she still keeps Alex's room largely as he left it, including his last load of laundry. Her philosophy—"Maybe someday, but not today"—offers permission to process loss without timelines or judgment. This same compassion extends to how she honors Alex's kind spirit through "pay it forward" cards, performing random acts of kindness in her son's memory.
For fellow grieving parents, Alison's wisdom is both simple and profound: "If you want to talk about your child, talk about your child." And for everyone: "Give grace. Just give everybody grace." Including yourself.
This conversation reminds us that grief evolves but doesn't disappear, and that finding peace comes not from "moving on" but from carrying our loved ones with us as we continue living. As Alison puts it, success in grief can be as simple as putting your feet on the floor each morning—a powerful reminder for anyone navigating life after loss.
"Dream Bird" by Jonny Easton
Thank you for listening to Warrior Moms podcast. It is an honor to share about our beloved children gone too soon, and we hope by telling of our loss, it may help someone in their grief journey. Please note that we are not medical professionals and encourage those listening to seek help from mental health professionals.
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Website: https://www.warriormoms.me/
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With love,
Warrior Moms Amy & Michele
Hello and welcome back to Warrior Moms I am Michelle Davis and I am Amy Durham and we are so glad to have y'all back with us, and we're also very excited to have our friend Allison Chick to talk about her son, alex. It's just, it's a terrible. I'm glad you're here, but I'm not glad you're here, as we always say. Right, allison? Why don't you go ahead and introduce yourself and let everybody know who you are?
Speaker 3:I'm Allison Chick, Alex's mom, and I'm born and raised in.
Speaker 2:Georgia.
Speaker 1:Raised our family in Georgia Go dogs. She says, yes, I don't know. Well, tell us, tell us about Alex.
Speaker 3:Alex was an old soul, very kind, smart, very smart. Just did things for people. I remember one time I had to take him to excuse me to. He was at Milton and so I went to drop him off in the line and I said Alex. I said that young girl has had crutches and carrying bags on each side and he was like, oh, mom, she'll be fine and I was like, okay. So I went about my day. Well, I got to work and I got an email from a teacher that he had gone and taken the bags and walked her all the way to her classroom. My gosh yeah, my gosh yeah.
Speaker 2:Thoughtful, because most teenage boys don't think that no yeah.
Speaker 1:You're like oh, mom, you know she's fine, and then that would truly be it.
Speaker 2:Yeah.
Speaker 3:Yeah, yeah. So he was thoughtful Just would go to my parents' house if my mom needed anything help with anything, and so yeah, so take us back to that terrible day.
Speaker 3:So Alex graduated from Milton on a Tuesday I think it was May 1st 2019. And then we had his graduation party that Saturday with family and friends, and it was also Memorial Day weekend, so we had the party Saturday and then Sunday we were off work and he was out of school. He had gotten a motorcycle as a graduation gift. He had begged took the safety course for it, and I just was like, oh, but Cliff and I talked about it and so we were going to get him a motorcycle for his graduation. We went and looked at the different bikes and there's the fast crotch rocket ones.
Speaker 3:I was not doing that, cliff and I picked the one that we thought was going to be good as far as you know, getting him out of the way, but not super fast, yeah, so we had given him that for his graduation, and so Cliff and Alex were working in our barn to make it louder. So I always thought, with motorcycles, like the muffler you'll hear, like on the Harleys, they're really loud, yeah, but that's so, that's a safety, so it's so people can hear them.
Speaker 1:Didn't know that either.
Speaker 3:Yeah, because I went down there and I was like, oh my gosh, you have to make it like so loud and he's like, mom, it's, it's for the safety, so people can hear the motorcycle. And I was like, so he came up cause he was going over to his girlfriend's for a barbecue and Cliff and I were going to run to the grocery to get stuff to cook on the grill and he was going into shower and so we said our goodbyes and Cliff and I went to the sorry, to the store, and when we got back he had already left Mercedes and so Cliff had started the grill and I sat on the front porch swing and I was just doing Facebook and I stopped because Milton police had put a traffic advisory at 140 in Ranchette and I was like motorcycle accident. And so my heart, oh my heavens, immediately, immediately, yeah, which it's only like not even a half a mile from where we live. So I immediately go to 360 because we have that on our phone. And Alex was just pinged right there. So I ran inside and said I need you to look at my phone because I need to make sure I'm not seeing things. So he said tell Seth, we'll be back. We're just running up the road. So I told Seth we'll be right back, we just have to run an errand.
Speaker 3:So by the time we were making our way up 140, traffic was stopping and we weren't getting anywhere. So there's Sweet Apple and then Ranchette's just a little farther up. So when we get to Sweet Apple they were directing traffic to go down Sweet Apple and Cliff just got out of line and went up there and we both just ran up to the cop that was there and just was begging. You know, please tell us what color the bike is. Who is it? Who is it? Another police officer came down and said y'all need to get in the truck and get to North Fulton. And we're like what's? You know what's the name? And he was like you need to get to North Fulton, so we get back in Cliff's truck. And I mean he just drove like a bat out of hell.
Speaker 3:We got to North Fulton hospital and went in and I just felt like everybody was already staring at us and I was begging them. My son was brought in by ambulance with a motorcycle accident and so they just kind of stood there. It was like we were frozen in time and at one point they said well, we need you to come in this room. And so they took us into, like I mean, it was a little bitty room, like back in the ER or like on the office, it was kind of like off to the side. So we went in there and we were just sitting there waiting and waiting and then two nurses came in and wanted to know who we were and stuff like that.
Speaker 3:And I vaguely remember them saying like I said I need to see him, I want to go back and see Alex, and they said we don't, that's not a good idea. And I said why not? And that's where they said you know, we couldn't save him. He's gone. At that point I just remember falling to the floor and screaming and I said I don't, I didn't believe him, I don't know why. I just remember falling to the floor and screaming and I said I don't, I didn't believe him, I don't know why. I just did not believe him. I wanted to see him. And they said that's, that's not a good idea. And so Cliff then said okay, then I'll go back. And they said, oh, so they allowed Cliff to go back and then he was, they were gone. It felt like forever, because now I'm in the room by myself and Cliff came back and I could just tell by the look on his face and I just yeah, horrific.
Speaker 2:So that's a moment that you will never get out of your head. Your memory will that? That look that Cliff had and everything is a moment that is stuck of your head. Your memory will that look that Cliff had and everything is a moment that is stuck in your head Not stuck, but it's there forever, it's just yeah, it's engraved in my mind. There you go. That's the word I'm looking for.
Speaker 3:So then the next thing was okay, like Cliff wanted to know how it happened, I wasn't leaving the hospital. So I told him you know, go, because I'm not leaving until I have to have proof or whatever. So I started calling family and my sisters and my mom and my dad, and just then the whole emergency room was just, I mean, packed.
Speaker 1:And Cliff went back to the scene, or where did he?
Speaker 3:go. Yeah, he went back to the scene. We sent a. Go. Yeah, he went back to the scene. We sent a family friend to go get Seth. How old was Seth? So there's five years, so he was 13. He was 13. The next thing I knew is I don't know how long we stayed there. I didn't want to leave Some point. My dad and my mom, they were like you know, we got to go. So we had to leave At some point. My dad and my mom, they were like you know, we got to go, so we had to leave.
Speaker 3:So we went, you know, to my mom's, because that's where everybody was going at that point, and so you know, then it's the next days of planning, you know, the funeral.
Speaker 2:That's so sad. Like he had just planned his graduation. He had just had his graduation party and now you're planning a funeral Like that. Was that that sped up so fast?
Speaker 3:Yeah, people that had come into town basically turned back around. Yeah.
Speaker 2:So yeah.
Speaker 3:My gosh.
Speaker 2:Allison, I remember that. I remember that because our son, Chase, graduated the same year, but from Cambridge, and you know my Alec passed away three weeks before your Alex did. So we're like right there on that same timeline and it was just so raw and just so everything you know, because we were. I just remember him coming home and telling me about, you know, a boy from Milton, and it was just a hurt for you at that time.
Speaker 1:I mean, we can't say it enough. But it's just, it's a pain that does not have a word for.
Speaker 3:No, no, it's. It's somewhere we read, or somebody put it on the Facebook page of it being like a rock, you know in your pocket and you know I've learned just to navigate life differently. It's still hard to believe that we're coming up on. Is it six? It'll be six years in May.
Speaker 1:Yeah, and sometimes it feels like it really is a lifetime ago. And then other times it's like whew, it was just yesterday.
Speaker 3:Yeah, yeah. We later learned with the accident that in Arnold Mill if you're familiar with 140, it kind of curves. And so when he was headed towards Alpharetta, a landscape truck had turned in front of him and there was nowhere for him to go. It's a small world because there were two moms that had stopped. They didn't see the accident happen, but there was two moms that stopped and were with him. Wow, yeah, wow, does that bring you some comfort? Yeah, I call them my angels. Yeah, and one is a, you know, a really close friend with another warrior mom, and so it was just around the funeral with Rayanne, oh my God. So it was just, and at the funeral they kept saying you know, alex is a warrior for the Lord. And they went to the Woodlands Camp, which is the Christian camp.
Speaker 3:And he loved the woodlands, hiking and rock climbing and kayaking, all that stuff that you know dirt bike riding. He had ridden dirt bikes since he was, I mean, old enough to walk and I think that's why we thought that the bike was okay, Right, but yeah.
Speaker 2:Allison, and it was okay, it was okay, Right, but yeah, allison, and it was okay, it was okay. Yeah, and I know that that's something that you've toyed with. Probably have we not gotten in the bike, you know, and that is that whole what if world, that we could do that all day. But it was okay to get him that bike because he did everything, you know, and this is just one of those terrible, terrible things that just happen for no reason, no reason, yeah.
Speaker 3:He would have bought it himself.
Speaker 2:He would have saved the money.
Speaker 3:And he was very surprised when he was not expecting it at all.
Speaker 2:Yeah, yeah.
Speaker 3:He knew that that's probably the one thing that his mom was not going to allow.
Speaker 1:Yeah, oh, my gosh was not going to allow. Yeah, oh, my gosh. Well, tell us about your cards that you have created and pass out in honor of Alex. The pay it forward card.
Speaker 3:Yeah, so I saw that on. I don't believe this particular mom is in Georgia, but I saw it somewhere where she had made pay it forward cards in honor of her son and I had gone on message or an aster. You know, do you mind if I kind of steal your idea? But so we just have like a little message, you know, to do a random act of kindness in honor of Alex, and you know, if I'm in McDonald's and I just it's on my heart, then I'll pay for the guy or female behind me and then ask the cashier to give them the card so they know it was done in Alex's honor.
Speaker 1:I remember getting a card and I immediately used it. I went to Starbucks. Yeah, I just thought that was the neatest you know in such a sad, horrific time. But to be able to. You know, it's like this secret little kindness that you're doing and that feels like the stories that you tell about him, like he's not, you know, gregarious with you know oh, look at all the things I do but he was just this gentle, kind person he was.
Speaker 2:He was, and you always use the quote stay humble and kind when you talk. Now, what is that? Tell us?
Speaker 3:about that. It just it's a song by Tim McGraw that just that is relics. That song, you know when people would play it and I would share it, probably every Monday for a while on Facebook and then people would hear it on the radio and I would get texts of you know, we're thinking of you and it just the humble and kind you know. So just spreading kindness in this world and yes, and I see your purple nails.
Speaker 3:Yeah, so Alex's favorite color was purple and I think we learned that from just some of like his pictures. He always had purple. So yeah, if it's one thing I can put out there that has brought me peace is to look for signs and not force. Think them, but it's just out of nowhere. They send their little winks. You know God's in control, but I call them Alex winks.
Speaker 1:So yeah, love that, and in your backyard you've created kind of a space for you to have that quiet time.
Speaker 3:Yeah, Just where I pull up and it's just a garden where you know I have an angel, and I did like a river and painted the rocks purple and plant purple flowers. I think it was one of my first Mother's Day, which was you know it's tough, if not every Mother's Day.
Speaker 3:But I was out there and I just said, you know, I just, alex, I just need a sign it's Mother's Day. I want to know you're near. And so nothing came crashing from the sky. There was some, you know, lightning strike, but then there was like blades of grass coming up through the rocks and I just was pulling out the grass and I wish I could see, but there's a petal in the shape of a heart right next to some grass and I was like okay, yeah, yeah, yeah, that was his. I'm here, mom. I mean that is so cool, because I don't believe in coincidences. So, yeah, that's what brings me. Peace is just those little winks.
Speaker 1:You know something I remember that I was just searching for. You know, could these signs actually be signs or are they? You know, is it just like what you said? You're forcing them in some way? And I went down this whole rabbit hole of like going, you know, do mathematicians talk about? Like who who's trying to disprove it? You know, and I stumbled upon an essay from Albert Einstein that talked about like he went, sought to you know, prove that there are in fact coincidences. And he got as close as he could mathematically, and the finding was that you can't prove coincidences mathematically. Finding was that you can't prove coincidences mathematically.
Speaker 3:And so his quote is that coincidences are the way God remains anonymous. Wow, I love that.
Speaker 1:I know he couldn't prove that mathematically that coincidences do actually occur, that coincidences do actually occur, and so his finding, or his quote that goes with the findings, is that coincidences are the way God remains anonymous. I love it, I love it, love that, yeah, yeah. So you had that, god wink, had you had them. You know, leading up to you, know that that first Mother's Day.
Speaker 3:I don't um, I don't know, cause there's a fog. Brain is real.
Speaker 2:Yeah.
Speaker 3:Like as we were, you know, talking, I was trying to remember the name of Rayanne's friend, and it was Aaron, and it just popped in yeah, aaron and Mally, um. And that, yeah, they, um, they were my angels, because as a mom I couldn't get there. Yes, so, yeah, yeah.
Speaker 1:And I love that, the earth angels, because we have these people that just do these things that just seem extraordinary. You know that are just a gift, that they didn't know really even what they were giving us and they did it anyway.
Speaker 3:So can I tell you about Mally. So with Mally, my husband, we have German Shepherds, we have one and still a Yorkie.
Speaker 3:But this was when Bella's mom was still here with us and so my husband has a shop up Hickory Flat and there's a gas station next door, and so Princess Bella's mom would be kind of out, not going anywhere, and Mally and her daughter were going. In Long story short, they found out that Mally's daughter had been mauled by a big dog, so her fear of dogs was immense. Well, cliff saw it and he told them no, no, no, she's good, she's good. So that was the first time that Mally's daughter had ever pet a big dog since that Right, oh my gosh, that was probably maybe fog ring, but maybe two years before the accident. Mally is one of the moms that was there for Alex. Oh, my.
Speaker 2:God, wow, you can't make that up.
Speaker 1:And I mean that is such a busy, busy area, I mean it's I just the timing of all that is unbelievable.
Speaker 2:And the ability to connect it, the gift of the connection.
Speaker 3:Yeah, I have a lot of connections as far as the W moms. So, kathy, her husband, dave, was Alex's bus driver. Yeah, so they were. They came to the viewing and I didn't know who they were, but he had introduced me, introduced himself to me, as you know. Alex's bus driver. So it's just yeah, it's what is that?
Speaker 2:It's a seven degrees to Kevin Bacon, it's seven degrees to Kevin Bacon.
Speaker 3:But yeah, so to know that you know. Cliff kind of soothed Mally's daughter in the fear of big dogs and I don't know if that conquered her fear or not, but at that moment it was good. Yeah, right For her to pet, you know, princess, and then fast forward that Mally then was there To comfort Alex.
Speaker 1:To be there with Alex.
Speaker 3:Yeah.
Speaker 1:Oh gosh, that is beautiful. What is it that you miss most about Alex? I know.
Speaker 3:He was a lot of things, but he was a prankster he was, yeah. So, growing up, like my dad and I have this thing of being the biggest jokester, the master of jokes, right. And so then when Alex got old enough, he then started to want to be the master of the joke. That is so cute. But just his smile and just his heart. I mean he'd be out once he got to drive and go off. He always would come back and bring me Reese's Pieces. Just didn't ask him, he just would do it. It's just his heart and his smile. He just had an infectious smile.
Speaker 1:My goodness, I'm so sorry, but I'm so glad to hear these. Just I mean, like I said, these intersections, but these just moments in your life that give you some peace. You know that you have that when we think about all of us. You know, joining warrior moms. What does that brought?
Speaker 3:you.
Speaker 1:How has?
Speaker 3:that helped, Just knowing that I'm in a room with moms that get it that understand and um, and that what I've learned is in watching y'all, that you can still laugh and it's okay.
Speaker 1:Yeah, yeah, um, I think that was one of the first things you and I had talked about was that you feel guilty, that there was that sadness and you're just, you know, unsure about. You know, we all feel that at some point, you know, because in those early days you're, of course, you're shattered, you're absolutely shattered, and so there's an inability to even feel joy, you know, right for a good long while.
Speaker 3:Yeah, and I think sometimes it's when you and people in your close friends, families, even acquaintances, sometimes they will say things and inside you just want to. You know, I wanted to punch some people but really, in all, they don't know, they don't, they don't have a clue, and so you have to give people grace. Yeah, I would always hear oh well, alex wouldn't want you to be sad. Yeah, how do you know what Alex would want? Alex wouldn't want you to be sad. Yeah, how do you know what Alex would want? You know another one is well, don't you have another son? You know Alex and Seth were close, they were typical brothers, they had a love-hate relationship. Yeah, but you would want to say well, which child would you choose?
Speaker 1:Yeah, right.
Speaker 3:I mean, it's just yeah, it's, but it is true, it is true, but what I learned was they have to say something and they love you, yeah, and so with that you have to give them grace, and I learned that early on, but just really with the warrior moms. It's just learning lessons and and what little things y'all have done to get peace. And you know, I hate to say move forward because I still haven't grasped that.
Speaker 2:No, yeah, but continuing to live, maybe, yeah, yeah. So what is something that has helped you the most Like? I know you have your purple garden and like coming to Warrior Moms, but what is something that has really helped you to?
Speaker 3:find peace, just trying to be kind to other people, like Alex would like living, so he would be proud. You know um of me, um me too, just just to be kind. Yeah, you're not gonna. You know some people are going to make you mad. It doesn't take madness away or emotional way, but just try to be kind to everybody. It's really brought me the most. Don't sweat the small stuff. It's like you know things could be worse, so things that I would get so like went out of shape.
Speaker 3:It's like now. It's like yeah, so yeah, a lot of lessons, and that makes me more at peace, you know, with not getting so upset over little things. What were those?
Speaker 1:dark days like. What are the dark days like?
Speaker 3:Not wanting to go anywhere. I find a lot of peace inside my house, so I like being at home, but I like getting out too. But I'm trying to figure out a way back there. It's just where I have Alex's room. We still have his room.
Speaker 2:That's where I've kept all his you know things, and so sometimes still just how he left it, or have you gone in there and, like, tidied it up?
Speaker 3:I, you know, I'll mop and sweep in there and I've taken. Well, I took a picture of his bed, cause we just put like the what do they call it? The memorial of all his Bibles and his books. Oh, that's one thing I want to tell you was so I take a picture, I take everything off, I clean it up and then I put it right. There is in his bathroom. His slides are still there from where he came out of them to get in the shower that day. I have not touched them and I still have his last load of laundry. That is one thing I just just can't. I can't bring myself to do it.
Speaker 1:I know I have. I have that too. There's Carter's got a lacrosse bag that I just won't touch and it's, you know, it's stinkier and stinkier and and it just doesn't matter and and I I think that's got to sound really strange to people that haven't walked this path with us.
Speaker 3:Yeah, but it would be the last time I would be able to do. You know, his laundry. And I just, I can't yet. Maybe one day, right, but yeah, not today. Yeah, and that's what I have to tell myself. Is what would people think if I had six-year-old laundry?
Speaker 2:My underwear sure is dirty.
Speaker 1:No.
Speaker 3:But not today, and I'm okay with that.
Speaker 1:I love that phrase, alison Gosh. We have never talked about that or thought about it have we Maybe someday, but not today. Gosh, I love that. That is. I just have full chills.
Speaker 3:I think that gives such grace to yourself, yeah you have to give yourself grace, cause if I believe, if you don't, like I might be under the covers today, putting y'all off day after day, but I had a lot of support, you know, with family and friends, and you have to let people be there for you too. The company I work for, you know my my leadership has been huge support. They take the cards and do the random act of kindness and friend. Yeah, so it just keeps going. So just choose what you can do. Today you were going to say something about the Bible, so it was interesting. So of course, during the, you know, there was an investigation into the accident and stuff that's probably too hard for me to discuss today. But the one thing that they thought and I don't know if it was because he was a teenager on a motorcycle in Milton or what have you, but they searched his backpack that he had and maybe they, I think, that they were looking for something Uh-huh.
Speaker 1:Yeah.
Speaker 3:But they found his Bible.
Speaker 1:Oh his.
Speaker 3:Bible they found was his Bible.
Speaker 2:Oh my gosh.
Speaker 1:A warrior for Christ. Oh, my, that's beautiful. Yeah, so that phrase not today. What's what's a small success? That you see gosh in that first year or two or three, that you couldn't do that. Now you're like gosh, okay, I have a small success, like for me.
Speaker 1:I know I couldn't go get my hair done. I went one time and I cried the whole entire time. I think it was sitting still and that small talk, and I just I absolutely couldn't do it. I think it was sitting still that and and that small talk, and I just I absolutely couldn't do it.
Speaker 3:I think it was five years maybe before I went and had it professionally done so in the beginning, probably just venturing out of the house and starting to go like to go back to work, cause I found that as long as Cliff was staying at home after it happened, then I'm going to stay home and then I I can't speak for Cliff, but I think it kind of was the same. So one of us had to, and he owns his own business, so he could have stayed home till today. But but yeah, it was just that, that step to.
Speaker 3:To making to go back to work that is huge, isn't it? Yeah? Yeah, to making to go back to work that is huge, isn't it? Yeah? But now I was, you know, I did have a lot of support at work and and still to this day do. But I was talking with a mom not too long ago that just lost her son in September and she was majorly you know in the beginning, right Struggling. And I said as long as if you got up today and put your feet on the floor, and I said, as long as if you got up today and put your feet on the floor, then you succeeded. Yes, that's it. If you feel okay with that, then you succeeded. Yes, so sometimes you're not going to get out of bed, you're not going to take a shower, you're not going to brush your teeth, you're not going to eat, and that's okay.
Speaker 1:That's right, yeah, because I mean our love is so deep and it's going to just knock us to the ground on many days and we have to take care of that, right.
Speaker 3:And it still knocks me to the ground sometimes. Yes, absolutely Alex's friends getting married and some, you know, just moving forward, right, and so I don't begrudge that one bit. But so, yeah, there are going to be things that you have to face and yeah, absolutely my goodness.
Speaker 1:How is Seth through all of this and how have you guys navigated that?
Speaker 3:I think Seth is doing really well. I will say we had some very bumpy road.
Speaker 1:Yeah, 13 is a tough age, no matter what yeah.
Speaker 3:So his confidant. You know they probably were in their room, like I can't believe she's making it.
Speaker 3:You know it was his best friend and Seth is. He's a guy, so he's not going to go too far into his emotions. Earlier, at 13, 14, I think, he tried to navigate it on his own and it was like immediately, both Seth and I were in therapy immediately and she said it's kind of like Seth was sitting on a ball in the pool and he's just he's navigating it, but at some point that ball is going to come out. Oh wow, and it did, and we faced it head on. And he's doing, he's doing really good. Now, yeah, he'll talk about Seth or Alex a little bit, but but that's okay.
Speaker 1:Right, exactly, we all take our our own journey right and find how we carry our children, our brother, our sister, with us. You know, yeah, because I told Seth.
Speaker 3:I said you know, yes, we both lost Alex. I lost a son and you lost a brother. I still have my sisters, so I don't know what that grief is. Right Doesn't mean that I'm not here for you. So it's like I was saying around Christmas time grief is like a fingerprint or a snowflake. No, grief is the same. And there's, you know, my husband, cliff Hill. He grieves differently than I do, and that I had to learn early on. It was like I was trying why isn't he doing this and why isn't he doing that? And it's because we're two different people and we grieve differently. And so Seth is going to grieve differently, absolutely. So yeah, and we grieve differently.
Speaker 1:And so Seth is going to grieve differently, absolutely so yeah, and you just have to accept that that is how it is and kind of love them through it all, right, yeah, give them grace, and you too Give them grace, my gosh. Well, allison, what final kind of advice You've given us. So many little gems, my gosh. Is there any other kind of piece of advice that you would tell and maybe it's not even to a grieving mom, maybe it's to the family and friends you know? You said some people don't know what to say, any of those areas. Or you think there's an advice that you would like to give a grieving mom or to somebody else listening that hasn't lost a child but wants to help?
Speaker 3:Okay. So to grieving moms, I will say that if you want to talk about your child, talk about your child because they're your child. Don't not because you think it's going to make others feel uncomfortable. It might, but it's your right to talk about your child and they will always be your child. And to the people that have been there for me, I just I don't know. I just I have felt the love and the support, and still do to this day. But I would just say my biggest thing is give grace. Just give everybody grace.
Speaker 1:Yes, I love that.
Speaker 2:Alison, you're such a jewel. Thank you for being here.
Speaker 1:Thank you for being here. Now I've got it. Now I see you as this master prankster. I have a new task.
Speaker 2:Michelle just accepted the challenge.
Speaker 1:I was like we have a new thing to add to our group. We haven't tapped into that, oh my gosh. Well, thank you for being here. I know it's hard but it's so meaningful and I hope you feel just that you get a little bit some peace in sharing Alex who he was and what happened and just his kindness.
Speaker 3:Like you, said yeah, and I think I speak for all the moms. If it's we can help just one mom, then yeah, I love it.
Speaker 1:Well, I know I'm going to carry not today with me, that's for sure.
Speaker 3:Yeah, not today.
Speaker 2:Heck, yeah, that's my new motto. One day, but not today.
Speaker 1:Not today, oh my gosh. Well, thank you and listeners, if you want to find out more about all of us Warrior Moms, allison is one of the Warrior Moms that has authored a chapter about Alex and her strategies, and so that will be in our Warrior Mom book that comes out in August, and you can go to wwwwarriormomsme to get links to the podcast to find out more about the Warrior warrior moms and more about our book.
Speaker 2:Yes, please go, and you can also send us a note on there, a recommendation, or you can sign up to be on the podcast. Yay, all right, thank you everyone. Thank you, allison and Michelle for being here. Yes, thank you. Bye, ta-ta.
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